The Sporting Chameleon

an absolute cheesecake of a sports blog

Archive for the ‘Football’ Category

Torres: Waning? Waned? Or Not Waning?

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FERNANDO TORRES hit the net last night, but his Liverpool side slumped to another defeat – this time against Blackpool.

But Torres has found goals hard to come by this season; last night’s was just his seventh in the Premier League.

Those goals have come at a rate of one every 232 minutes, whereas in his first three seasons in England his 56 goals arrived every 107 minutes.

When does a lack of form become an irreversible decline for a top-quality sportsman? Read the rest of this entry »

Written by Andrew Brook

January 13, 2011 at 8:39 pm

No country for old man

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MANCHESTER UNITED striker Michael Owen has given his side a massive boost by declaring himself fit for their festive fixtures.

Except he hasn’t.

No-one cares. Sorry Michael. Read the rest of this entry »

Written by Andrew Brook

December 24, 2010 at 10:42 am

German umbrella makers cash in

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FORMER England manager Steve McLaren is fast becoming as popular in Wolfsburg as he is in England.

The German side sit just four points above the relegation zone.

And supporters showed their displeasure with McLaren aka the Wally with the Brolly during their 2-2 draw with Hoffenheim with a funny and original taunt. Read the rest of this entry »

Written by Andrew Brook

December 20, 2010 at 10:38 am

Jermaine Beckford: English football’s possible saviour

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TO BEGIN I would like to point out that there are fewer footballers I dislike more than Jermaine Beckford.

He made his name playing for Leeds United, the main local rivals of my team, Huddersfield Town and I was at Elland Road last season when he reacted worse to being substituted against Southampton than any player I have seen.

But this season he has the opportunity to revolutionise the way Premier League sides recruit their players. Read the rest of this entry »

Brazil and North Korea paper over cracks

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ON DAY five of the World Cup the tournament finally produced a game that managed to be both evenly matched and satisfactorily entertaining.

Three goals! Three actual goals! From different sides!

All three goals (assuming you believe Maicon, who has previous, meant it) were in fact just like watching Brazil.

A grown man cried at his national anthem, as though his life depended on it. Which it might have done.

Dunga wore a funny coat, which was possibly meant for a lady, but made him look like a camp tugboat driver.

What more could a football supporter want?

But the thirteen games prior to Brazil v North Korea were mainly drivel and emblematic of a worrying trend in world football. Read the rest of this entry »

Americans still fail to understand football

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DESPITE officially being as good as England at football – the inventors of the game – Americans still do not quite get it.

As today’s New York Post proves. Read the rest of this entry »

Written by Andrew Brook

June 13, 2010 at 4:57 pm

King and Carragher live the dream

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IT IS SAID that every young English boy dreams of playing football for England.

But the games in those dreams are never played in Minsk, Almaty or Dnipropetrovsk.

Which means that Ledley King and Jamie Carragher have made Matthew Upson look like a bit of a fool. Read the rest of this entry »

England are a mere distraction to the main event

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AFTER all the hype the World Cup has finally begun, but France v Uruguay, the first match most people will have watched, was very, very dull.

Yet I, and presumably most other people, persisted with the game between two teams we do not really care about.

And this is the essence of the World Cup. Read the rest of this entry »

Mourinho attempting to tick ego-boxes

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REAL MADRID will finally unveil José Mourinho as their new manager on Monday after agreeing compensation with Inter Milan.

Despite Inter being owed £13.5million under the terms of Mourinho’s contract, club president Massimo Moratti settled for a deal worth between £6 and 7million.

Even though Mourinho is probably the best manager of his generation, this deal means Real Madrid have spent considerably less on him than they did on Jonathan Woodgate. Read the rest of this entry »

We’ll see him crying on the telly

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TONIGHT’S the night. The night where we will finally discover if all the excitement was worth it.

We will discover if he has picked the right team.

We will discover if it was just about the money or if it was really about being crowned the best around on July 11.

We will discover if abandoning the WAG was the right decision.

It is the game everyone’s been waiting for – Adrian Chiles makes his ITV debut. Read the rest of this entry »

Written by Andrew Brook

May 24, 2010 at 6:11 pm